All my life, I have suffered from a need to appear perfect in other people’s eyes. I thought I had to do everything right in order to be accepted and when something did not go the way I wanted it to, I would get frustrated and angry. I knew I had to learn to control this frustration because if I let it build up, I would become angry. Anger would take away my motivation to accomplish something and I would simply give up.
I have learned that the cause of frustration can be something I have no control over and that everyone experiences frustration many times in their lives. The difference is how we each react to it. I know that if I give in to it, I become irritable and annoyed. I make bad decisions based on my emotions in that moment. But if I react in a more positive way, I can find a way to overcome the problem.
Now, when I start to feel frustrated over a situation, I know that my perception is probably getting in the way of reality. I have found it very effective to talk to someone who can view the situation objectively and may have a perspective on it that I am not seeing. I have also learned to accept the reality that not everything is perfect, including myself. Sometimes, life will throw curves and I have to accept that some things are simply out of my control.
If there is no-one I can talk to at that moment, I take a walk – I find it very effective and it usually prevents me from acting immediately on my emotions and making that rash decision. I also have learned not to blame myself for things that happen – it is better to use that mental energy to try to find a solution. I focus on what I am grateful for, not what is wrong in my life.
We all have goals and we are all going to encounter frustrations along the way but what is important is that we deal with them in a positive and productive way.